From the recording Find Myself
Lyrics
Do you ever just look around
See everything you ever dreamed off
But yet
Still feel alone?
On my own, I'm forever on my own
I've got one million problems but I cannot take them home
I do not want my kids to see the king fall off his throne
I don't have an ego we each idolise our own
Parents, but it is apparent
That I cannot seek help
Or find a deterrent
When I pop my pills the OCD it doesn't lessen
Wonder if the streets got me on a Valium alternate
On the other hand when I've taken shit too far
And the paranoia’s starting to piss Jodie off
I talk to the doctor and I tell her all my flaws
She thinks I'm depressed and offers alternative drugs
But I knock them back, cause I'm not taking any old shit
Yes I understand, that to some I am a hypocrite
But just hear me out
There's a very happy side to me
The OCD only operates before two times
Sleep and leave
On my own, I'm forever on my own
I've struggled with my job for 16 years, no one knows
At least not at the top because on trips I must still go
Gotta feed the fam so my weakness I cannot show
I affect my personality
To talk charismatically
Appear to live in happiness and cover up the black abyss
Popping pills relaxes me, I really feel the pressure ease
But then I can't be fucked and I got 3 kids to appease
So I take them sparingly
Dangerous, territory
After a few days their locked away
Yeah, and I ignore em
Now what my to do?
Gotta see a pal or two
Not been out in months maybe a drink would do me good?
I pick up the phone before I know I am just scrolling
And so much time passes by I decide to just postpone it
Move it to tomorrow is the motto of my sorrow
A trend I often follow
That leaves me feeling hollow
On my own, I'm forever on my own
I've struggled with my job for 16 years, no one knows
At least not at the top because on trips I must still go
Gotta feed the fam so my weakness I cannot show
On my own, I'm forever on my own
I've struggled with anxiety my whole life no one knows
Used music as a means to feel good so I don't feel low
Now I use it as a tool to release shit and help me grow